I am sharing with you today a poem that I wrote many, many years ago, Middle Aged Housewife / Bohemian Child. I was on a long journey; the destination was myself. It was a difficult journey, sometimes it felt like a ride on the Titanic, there were dark, dark days, but every now and again the sun shone, I found it in the laughter of a child, the wag of my dog’s tail, a beautiful view, a chat with a friend. Over time the sun shone more and the darkness was less and I discovered something:
The freedom I was seeking was not in my environment, it was in myself, the freedom of my soul.
If this poem speaks to you, please know not to lose hope, keep on building yourself back up to your dreams one tiny step at a time. Sometimes from the most painful moments comes the greatest liberation.
Middle Aged Housewife / Bohemian Child
How have I got here?
Can this be me?
What happened to the bohemian child
Whose idea of adulthood was to paint and be wild.
At what point in time did I sell my soul
And end up half a person who only dreams of the whole
At what point in time of my history
Did the prison bars engulf me.
As I stare into the mirror on the wall
I realise that I don’t know myself at all
Neatly cut hair and sensible shoes
Frumpy clothes, not even a tattoo!
A lifetime of service devoted to those
Who took for granted me washing their clothes
And cleaning the carpet and cooking the tea
Little wonder then I forgot how to be me.
The bars are coming down now
I am waking from the coma
I realise it doesn’t mean my life is over
Once upon a time I had a dream
Since I lost it I have wanted to scream
I am coming out now of that dark, long detour
Where I am heading I cannot be sure
I will hold my dream with all my might
I’ll nurture and care for it day and night
And slowly, so slowly shall begin to emerge
The woman and the bohemian child
Who will spend her days painting
And sometimes be wild!
Do you know what? I do! I have 2 tattoos that I love, I paint, I teach healing and animal communication, I give healing and I communicate with animals. I am living my dream! It is never too late.
Hold onto hope and dreams and love.
Some of my paintings here.