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If this powerful poem speaks to just one reader and helps them to realise that they are not crazy, they are, in fact, in an abusive relationship then it has done it’s job.

I found this extremely powerful poem in a book called Ashes of her Love by Pierre Alex Jeanty.  My work in energy medicine is not strictly about victims of domestic abuse, nor is it a replacement for other professional help, but it is about working with people on a soul level helping them to become whole again (healed) in many of life’s challenges.

Many people who suffer mental abuse in a relationship do not realise that they are suffering at the hands of an abuser.  When living with narcissism you are slowly taken apart and all sense of self is destroyed, you are made to feel that the fault lies solely with you and that the abuser tolerates your  “irrational, oversensitive, hysterical, stupid, careless, forgetful, miserable, not smart enough, too smart, looking silly, talking too much, not talking enough, paranoid…….” behaviour – the list could go on!

So if you are in a relationship that has ever made you question your own sanity – please read this.  You are not crazy!

She was not crazy

She was not crazy
She was a victim of narcissism,
Finally free from being a puppet of your manipulation,
She was not crazy
She was awakened to the reality of who you are, growing aware of the deceit your mouth had fed her ears.

When did she go crazy?
When she realised her worth and came to the conclusion that she should not be in a  competition to feel important to a so-called lover?
When she stopped begging for consistency or demanding it, but found her way out of this love circus instead of carrying your promises in the centre of her heart, waiting for the day that you would fulfill them?
Was it when she started to doubt your secrecy, refusing to title it privacy when for you, it was nothing but a way to do your dirt in silence?

Was it when your empty ‘I love you’ started to feel like bullet wounds to her?

She grew bolder, but you created this mind game to maker her feel foolish for coming to her senses.
You convinced yourself that you were playing chess, trying to out-think her moves instead of joining hands with her and making your play about protecting your queen.

Crazy is the woman who loves blindly with itching ears, accepting everything.
Crazy is the woman who sees how her heart is being tortured and decides to stay to take care of yours.
Crazy is the woman who does anything for love even when that love does nothing good for her.

She is many things, but a crazy woman is not one whose blood boils with frustration for being fooled.  It is not a woman whose eyes carry anger after being punished for loving too hard and it is definitely not a woman who is smart enough to recognise your game and demand an audible out, or she will quit.

The problem is not that she’s as crazy you claim.  It is just that she wasn’t crazy enough to leave you long before.

I post this not just as a healer, but as a woman to whom this spoke with great volume because of my own journey.

 

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